Characters

Full name: Adrianne Kimi Kotolei

Pronunciation: Ay-dree-an Key-me Koh-toe-lay

Nickname or Alias: Adrian (Ay-dree-in) or Adri

Gender: Female, but identifies as male

Species: Ice Elf

Age: 16

Birthday: October 9th

Sexuality: Pansexual

Relationship Status: Single and not enjoying it.

Height: Roughly 5"8

Weight: 121 lbs

Figure/build: Visible hips because she's skinny in the stomach area. Has some muscle definition.

Hair colour: Blond in female form, brunette in male.

Hairstyle: Female - curly and to shoulder blades. Male - Short in the back, slight bangs, messy hair.

Eye colour: Dark gray

Tattoos: She isn't "allowed" any.

Piercings: Has a fake lip piercing but only uses it in school.

Frequently worn jewelery: Unnecessary black glasses used outside of the castle.

Smoker? Secretly, yes. Usually when she plays basketball. Yes, she multi-tasks. XD

Drinker? Noooo.

Any medication regularly taken: Adrianne's parents put her on depression medication because they think meds make eeeeverything better. D:

Likes: Basketball, hanging out, smoking, walking through the woods...

Dislikes: Being mistreated, called a girl, referred to as female, etc.

Phobias/Fears: Being found out in public school, or having her parents take away who she is on the inside.

Favourite colour: Black, gray, and orange in that order.

Hobbies: Playing sports, reading, learning, drawing, and not much else.

Taste in music: Classical. It's calming. Plus, there's not really any other music to listen to back then. XD

Favourite food(s): Chicken, pretty much all meat. Apples and asparagus. She's a messy eater, too.

Favourite drink(s): White wine or water. Nothing else, really.

Disliked food: Leafy stuff, like vegetables. Most fruits.

Disliked drinks: All alcohol that isn't wine. All juice but apple and orange juice.

Significant belongings: Her stolen guy clothes/Clothes she borrows from her brother without him knowing.

Peaceful or aggressive attitude? Acts peaceful but is actually assertive.

Siblings: A twenty year old sister named Bersidei Kadielzoun Kotolei (purple hair, elf ears pointed upward, white horns protruding from top of head) and a nineteen year old brother named Kahli Duhast Kotolei (also purple hair, elf ears pointed down, smaller white horns than Bersi). Bersidei is actually a closeted lesbian dating her friend Kamie Dulai Poverdich, who is a white haired faerie who goes by "Kay."



Describe their childhood (newborn - age 10):

Raised mainly by the family nurse, but never grew attached to anyone but her siblings. She disliked being treated differently because of her gender since age seven. Didn't want to wear dresses; she liked pants so she could run around outside, which her parents disallowed her of doing.

Age nine, she fell down the stairs because of high heel shoes her mother made her wear and spent a month in the hospital. They tried to get her to wear high heels again, but she would throw fits and they decided it was better to just drop it since it was probably dangerous, anyway. (Well, duh!)

Describe their teenage years (11 - 16):

Age twelve, started getting "breast buds" and thought she was turning into a monster. Made a big scene about it and had to have someone explain what was going on.

Around thirteen years old, she got her first menstrual period. She caused another scene because she thought she was dying or had an internal injury. These bodily functions have made her quite miserable; even more so than what her parents force upon her.

Fourteen years, she realized that something was different about her. She didn't see the way other girls saw, didn't like the things they liked, didn't want to dress the way they dressed, and so on. One day, at one in the morning, she sneaked into her brother's room and picked out a shirt and pair of pants, went back to her room, tried it on, and compared how his clothes felt and how hers felt. She preferred her brother's clothes, but put them back and stood for half an hour looking at herself in a full-length mirror in her own clothes. She pulled her shirt tightly to flatten her chest and thought that it looked more natural that way. Sometimes, while taking a bath, she'd put socks in her panties and look in the mirror, pretending that she had a penis. Afterward, she noticed that she was actually jealous of males. At some point, alone in her room, she drew a picture of herself, naked, hairless, and split in two, One side was male, and the other was female. She wrote personalities for each side, giving them the typical male and female stereotypes, and labeled them "Adrianne" and "Adrian." She felt closer to Adrian, and decided that she was never a "real girl."
Around this time, her parents decided that she was depressed - even though it was just her being miserable in her body and upset because of what her parents do to her and how the world treats females - and they got her put on depression medication. She tried refusing it, but ended up taking the pills, only to go to the bathroom afterward and spit them back up. Bleh.

Age fifteen, only a few weeks later, she drew Adrian, giving him clothes, hair, her interests and personality, etc. Adrianne felt like she was discovering herself, but was constricted by her parents' rules. She begged and begged and got her father to agree to send her to public school when she turned sixteen. At this time, she secretly made a wig designed like Adrian's hair and stole a bald cap from a beauty store. Later, she had taken six feet worth of ace bandage from the bathroom. No one missed it. Adrianne found sports to be fun, but never abandoned her love of art. She never really got to do anything sports-related but watch people play because she "is a girl, and girls don't play sports." She started learning how to sing because it let off steam she had accumulated and her parents made her pick up a violin tutor.
"Adrian" is finally going to his first day of public school. While he's nervous, the freedom he's gained is making him so extremely happy.

My name is Adrianne Kimi Kotolei and I'm sixteen years old. My birthplace is in the Demon World and I've just started my first year in public school. I'm rather excited and also very happy about being able to get out of my home for once. I hope to make friends and have a...

No. No, no, no. I can't write like this. Let me try again.

My name is Adrian Kimi Kotolei and I'm sixteen years old. I'm a transgendered Ice Elf living in Kontwan, the most major continent in the Demon World. I'm starting my first day ever in public school after tomorrow and I'm extremely nervous about it because I'm afraid that someone will figure out who I am, and in return, my parents will punish me for not "dressing properly" and then the whole continent and more will probably want to kill me or some other fucked up shit like that. You see, it's the early 1900s and sexism is a large part of where I live. Women are supposed to be quiet, servant-like, and are expected to wear only dresses, have long hair, and take care of all the housework unless they're rich and have servants to do the chores. I'm hoping that no one will find out about me so I can make friends and just spend time doing what I like to do instead of what is expected of and/or forced upon me.

I like playing basketball and pretty much all other sports. I like leaving my hair messy, wearing dark tank-tops that don't cover the waist band of my dark boxers that stick out of my dark pants that hang low and cover most of my dark shoes. See the connection? I guess I haven't mentioned that I'm practically gothic. My favorite colors are black, gray, and most surprisingly, orange. There's just something about orange... Okay, stop spacing out, me. Keep writing. Anyway, I like button-up shirts, too, but only as over-shirts. I never wear them alone, or bother to button them up. Guess that makes no sense, huh? Oh well, don't care.

I also enjoy all things art. Singing, dancing, and drawing, most importantly, are some of my favorite things to do. I wish I could go to the museums more to look at all the artwork they've posted up on the off-white walls. I tell you, that place is like a maze. So many rooms and floors to get lost on. They really need signs there to direct you around that place.

My favorite music is probably classical, but there isn't much to listen to when higher power controls everything you do - from the color of your toothbrush to how clean your room is, from the shine of your shoes to the stitches in your clothes... It's ridiculous. I hate it. Did I mention that I'm a prince(ss)? Yeah, not all it's cracked up to be. You have money, sure, but you don't get to spend it. It isn't your money. It belongs to your parents. And your parents are the boss of everything. When and how long you sleep, who you talk to, what you eat, everything, and I mean e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g you do.

Which is why I play "daddy's little girl" and beg for things I want.

"Daddy, may I please, please, go to public school? It would make me so happy! You want me to be happy, don't you?"

Do that, and you'll most likely get what you want, as long as it isn't illegal or "inappropriate" for a "young lady."

So yeah. I'm a brunette dude in a blonde girl. Don't make that sound perverted, just take it how I mean it - transgendered.

I'm not nearly this laid-back and relaxed. Well, at least not outside of what I write.

In person, I'm shy, quiet, cute, obedient... On the inside, I'm assertive, deceiving, and rebellious. But also very nervous and afraid. I'm like a living contradiction, damn.

I have to stop indenting and just write long paragraphs of shit no one else but me is ever gonna read. Really. No need to be technical and fancy about this. It's just my stupid life story put on paper or whatever. Anyway. As I already said, after tomorrow - which is Sunday, duh - I start my first ever day of public school, which is also high school. I'll be a, uh, sophomore, I think. School terms are so confusing. I think I'll just stop now and write about my first day when it passes. I've kinda run out of things to talk about anyway, unless I planned on writing about my trans-shit before going to bed.

Okay, so yeah again. I bind my chest. I do this with ace bandage so I can tie down my already almost non-existent breasts (Size = A 32 or something) so I'm completely flat and no one can tell that they're there. It hurts like fucking Hell because I can't breathe and it crushes my ribcage, but - not to sound horribly corny - it can't compare to the pain I feel from being in this wretched female body. Not that I'm sexist, mind you, I'm just a male mind in a female body. It's fucked up, I know, and I barely understand it. I just know that nothing about my physical appearance feels right and that it brings me nothing but awkwardness, pain, and misery. I can't relate to other girls, and I'm so freakin' jealous that guys get to go around playing sports, being free, doing whatever they feel like doing because they aren't constricted by society like anyone else that isn't Caucasian and male. It. Freakin'. Sucks. Not to sound totally emo or whatever, but seriously. Everything I do just screams "DUDE." Everything my parents try to force on me whispers "obedient, silent, only talk when talked to, be a ghost, disappear in the crowd, erase yourself..."


Yeah, I'm totally the next Shakespeare. Not. Okay, I've stopped caring. I'm gonna stop now and write about my first day of school next time I open up these pages. So, like, yeah. 'Bye and all that.